Wednesday, September 5, 2007
Day 1 (05/09/2007) Without Don Lim
Yesterday change everything.
I decided to ask him if he has got the answer (At that moment I was praying for good news). He told me he dunno. After lots of msn-ing he told me that he tried to savage our relation but he just dont know why the feeling is just not back. I told him things that he had done only shows that he wanna show that gal how much he loves her and not trying to save our relation. And he is only hurting me deeper and deeper. And finally he decided that we shall be friend. And while we be friends he also wanna reconsider. Will he really reconsider?
He told me we started as fren who knows one day he will realise I'm good and comes back to me. But what if he dont?
I broke down cried endlessly in office. Everybody saw it. But I dont care cos someone so precious to me had come to such a decision. Untill 7 plus in office he suddenly pick up his bag cried and wanna dash out of office. His parents stopped him. At that moment I told meself I'm the cost of everything. I give up. I will goes with his decision to make everyone happy. I'll shoulder everything myself than to see him cry see him sad.
His decision makes me felt damn terribly sad hurt pain. I dont know how am I gonna carry on with my life. I wish god will just take me away for good. End my pain once and for all. Family friends and him might feel sad at the beginning but I'm sure after a period of time everyone will just forget it. I am selfish to say all these but I just cant take it any more. Its so painful. I dont wanna see the world any more.
I cant accept the fact. I dont wanna be fren with you.
12:07 AM
