Thursday, October 25, 2007
Day 50 Without Don Lim
i watched him slept next to me in the car..
1:04 AM
Monday, October 22, 2007
Day 48 (22/10/2007) Without Don Lim
Yesterday night had the urge of seeing him and decided to surprise him by going down to his house to pass him something that I bought for him..took a train and reached there about 9+pm went to his house car park and realised his car wasnt around..that didnt stop me and I decided to wait for him..watched the vehicles and human traffic goes pass me..
its the Power Of Love..
Untill about 1am decided to give him a call to see if he's home..he picked up, he just reached home..told him to come down for a moment..he asked me (Q) "y did u wait for so long?" (A) "cos I miss u..I wanna see u so much"..
I know he doesnt want me to stay till so late just to wait for him and I know he doesnt want me to waste money too..but still because of loving him I cant seem to be able to control myself..
3hrs 15min in exchange for a few mintues with u..I'm willing cos I get to see u and seeing u make by day..
11:11 PM
Saturday, October 20, 2007
Day 46 (20/10/2007) Without Don Lim
Wasn't feeling really gd 2day cos yesterday I angered him and it affected me untill now..I really didnt mean to be rude..I'm only out to disturb him..
I feel so bad..
12:50 AM
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Day 43 (17/10/2007) Without Don Lim
Couldnt sleep yesterday..he was in my mind throughout..the moment I close my eyes its him..when I open up my eyes its still him..haiz..only manage to fall asleep at 4+am..after falling asleep I had dream..dreamt about him..was tat sleeping I doubt so..
I told myself I will nve log into friendster again..tats because I know I will be affected and my face will show all the unhappiness I had..I dun want my facial expression to tell him tat I'm sad cos by doing so we cannot improve..
Nwadays I loves tue wed thur cos its when I would be able to see him..hv lunch with him..communicate with him and also a chance for me to glaze at him untill I'm totally lose in his world..I just loves him more and more each day..and the fact tat I will be there for him whenever he need me..24/7..
2day went for lunch with him his Mummy & his Auntie..didnt ate much and I was watching him eat..aww I miss seeing him eat too..I shed 2 drops of tear but I looked away cos I didnt 1 him 2 see it..it just hurt me so much..
I miss everything and most importantly I loves him so much..I wanna be with him..I wanna spend the rest of my life with him..
My dvd player against me too..but I bought a new 1 with him 2day..I'll treasure this dvd player..tink I'm nut..haiz..
I'm still upset and yet I'm also tired by those acting I had to do each day..
I miss the kisses we had..
11:20 PM
Monday, October 15, 2007
Day 41 (15/10/2007) Without Don Lim
After so many days I finally logged into friendster..
And yes new pictures were posted and yet again I felt terrible..I know I shouldnt log in but I thought I would be able to control my emotion so I log in..guess I'm not..
U make me pick up a habit which I kicked..
11:13 PM
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Day 40 (14/10/2007) Without Don Lim
Last friday I finally stepped into town..its something which I was thinking if I should go cos I was afraid of bumping into them..well alex insist I go and said "aiya wun bump into tat china gal 1 lah"..anyway after getting present we meet up with carol for dinner at vilage..well memories again..its somewhere we used to go in the past..next was ktv..was enjoying at the beginning but towards the end tink of him and feel rather emo again..
Yesterday (sat) went to pay respect to someone and I was rather glad..
Today slept till 10 only..watch scv..lunch..slag..chatted with a fren on msn..it has been a long time since I chatted with her on msn for so long cos she used to brain wash me on msn bout him and I would choose not to reply her..but still I know she is concern bout me and I appreciate tat..after 7 years we are finally back in contact but too bad the Anna that she sees now is leading such a painful life..no longer the happy Anna..still I treasure this frenship..thanks for standing by me silently too..
She and others are trying hard to pull me out of the hole but somehw I feel I'm sinking in deeper and deeper each day..its something tat I felt in me..
Do sushi in the afternoon..sushi was something I learned for the sake of him..and each time I miss him I would do sushi snap pictures of it and send it to him through mms..
"YOU SEEMS TO BE ENJOYING THE PAIN"
10:44 PM
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Day 36 (10/10/2007) Without Don Lim
I send him long smses yesterday.. :-(
I couldnt sleep..as usual today late for work again..
He came to work today..he wore a shirt that I bought for him and so coincidentally I wore a polo tee that he bought for me..
still I wish we were fine..still loves him..still wanna lay in his arms..
I realised I loves staring at him nowadays..I guess I'm sinking deeper each day..
He knock off at 6 and I sms him..told him my mind is set & I had already make up my decision & thats why there is always a place for him in my heart..told him I will always be there..
心若倦了泪也干了
这份深情难舍难了
曾经拥有天荒地老
已不见你暮暮又朝朝
这一份情永远难了
愿来生还能再度拥抱
爱一个人如何斯守到老
怎样面对一切我不知道
回忆过去痛苦的相思忘不了
为何你还来拨动我心跳
爱你怎么能了
今夜的你应该明了
缘难了情难了
12:03 AM
Tuesday, October 9, 2007
Day 35 (09/10/2007) Without Don Lim
He posted 2 pictures of him and the slut..once again I collapsed..
Lost & all alone..
11:47 PM
Day 29 (03/10/2007) Without Don Lim
Ah Gong funeral is over today..I was super emo..fact tat next time will not be able to see Ah Gong and dreamland might be the place I can see him..
Due to emo and I lost control, I smsed him told him I couldnt bear to leave him but still his answer was a NO..He said he's not in a mood to talk and say msg tomorrow but I guess tomorrow I will not ask him..he might need to have a piece of mind cos the fact tat he just lost someone close.
Why did I sms him?..haiz..Day 25 (29/09/2007) Without Don Lim..
No more Ah Gong liaoz..he's died..29/09/2007
I was there seeing him go peacefully and I will remembered for the rest of my life the last few hours of his life..
It was a sad scene in hospital..everybody was sobbing..
Don was sobbing too..I wanna go forward to hug him but I didnt dare..afraid tat he might not like it..just wanna tell him I will be there for him..
Though he is not my Ah Gong I still felt damn sad cos no matter wat he is his Ah Gong and still remembered whenever we go Ah Gong house he will asked us to eat eat..I will miss the tao suan and tahu telok which Ah Gong cooked..
No more pain and suffering for Ah Gong..
11:16 PM
